Writers usually write about topics on which they are an expert. That's not the case here. I'm attempting to write about something I'm experiencing but don't quite know how to diagnose or solve…yet. Hopefully, this space, which has come with all the support you have given me over the past year of sharing my riding adventures through “Thoroughbred Makeover Diaries,” will help me take the first steps.
I started “Thoroughbred Makeover Diaries” because the plan was to compete at the Retired Racehorse Project Thoroughbred Makeover, an event I had announced for the previous five years, in 2020 with my 2016 bay OTTB mare Cubbie Girl North. The idealistic side of me thought this would be a space to showcase a fairytale George-Plimpton-esque journey of an announcer-turned-rider that would help an important cause to me in Thoroughbred aftercare.
The journey hasn't been a fairytale; it's been very real, filled with the most extreme highs and lows I've ever experienced, like when I got seven stitches and completed my first recognized event with Cubbie in the span of a week.
We didn't reach our destination because the 2020 Thoroughbred Makeover was postponed, as many sporting events of the past year were, because of COVID-19. Also, the extremes moments can be a blessing and a curse when working with retired racehorses straight off the track, especially if you're an amateur rider. Those extremes became more than I cared to experience as someone who's been riding for less than six years.
When the 2020 Thoroughbred Makeover was postponed, I decided to give Cubbie a break. I began working again with my first horse, the 2013 chestnut OTTB mare Grand Moony, whom I started showing under the name Sorority Girl in 2018. She had successfully competed in the Thoroughbred Makeover in 2017 with Ashley before becoming my first horse. The challenges of retraining a retired racehorse straight off the track that I experienced with Cubbie helped my journey with “Moo,” and we had our best results at events, even successfully moving up to the Novice level of 2-feet-11 at the end of 2020.
I decided that I wanted to continue progressing with Moo in 2021 and put my Makeover goals on hold. This year will be a “Mega Makeover” that includes the classes of 2020 and 2021, and announcing is my first priority. So, Cubbie is now on a free lease for the year with a caring, kind, up-and-coming trainer, Nicole Dayberry, and I hope I get to announce them at shows in Colorado and the surrounding area this year.
As I was arranging for Cubbie to go to Nicole, I told Ashley that I wanted to take a break from working with green OTTBs. So, naturally, as my wife and trainer who truly knows what's best for me, she found a retired racehorse that I should buy.
Kim Wendel, an upper-level eventer based in Colorado and a fellow board member with the organization that runs the Spring Gulch Horse Trials, was selling her 2017 grey OTTB gelding The Gray Man. “He'd be perfect for you,” was the sentiment of both Ashley and Kim.
“Well, s***, he's too nice to pass up,” I thought.
Long story short, a friend that rides at our barn, Rageena Price, and I decided to buy The Gray Man together. With his cool backstory and personality, a barn name of “Uno” because he only has one eye, and an eagerness to learn, this OTTB is full of potential for good times ahead. At the same time, he's a young horse full of playfulness and can be a lot to handle as a 16.3 hh big baby.
It's safe to say that Uno has a lot of personality, whether it be with his rider or with the Super G barn cat Archie. Photo by Ashley Horowitz
It's that balance that's exciting and terrifying. I imagine a scale where I weigh the pros and cons of OTTBs. On one side is the talent, the journey, and the reward for helping a racehorse successfully transition to a new life after retiring from racing. The Thoroughbred provides opportunities unlike any other horse breed. Weighing that down from the other side of the scale are the difficult learning moments for horse and rider, the miscommunication as they figure each other out, and, especially for a young OTTB, an exuberance that can be difficult to handle.
Unfortunately, I've fallen into the trap of looking at this scale before, during, and after every ride and then deciding whether it's all “worth it.” That's exhausting, and it leads to what I'm experiencing as “trainer fatigue.” It became worse as the big goal of competing in the Thoroughbred Makeover loomed.
So, what's the solution? After reflecting on everything I've written about, which is the most personally beneficial part of “Thoroughbred Makeover Diaries,” I've arrived at “change.” Change is difficult to implement, difficult to observe, and difficult to appreciate—at least for me.
Uno has shown an aptitude for jumping, but, as a young, energetic horse, he can also be a lot of handle. It's figuring out that balance that's a key to working with OTTBs. Photo by Ashley Horowitz
Not all OTTBs are alike. Now I'm working with a gelding instead of a mare. Cubbie would hold massive grudges. Uno does not. But, I have to appreciate that change and not fall into the trap that the journey with Uno will be the same as it was with Cubbie. I've changed my goals. It's not “Makeover or bust.” It's “What will make for a positive step forward, big or small, today?” And, hopefully, I will embrace that a backward step does not mean the end of progress or the journey.
Uno is excited about life and has a lot of energy. I would initially see that as a bad thing because his overeagerness is difficult to handle. However, that eagerness, once it's channeled, will be beneficial to taking big jumps on a cross country course. That's going to take time, so in the meantime, I lunge him before each ride. If he's hasn't been ridden in awhile, I'll close the doors to our indoor arena and let him run around. It used to freak me out, thinking, “I'm supposed to ride that,” but now it's cute.
I once told a corny joke while warming up on Uno and started laughing. At the sound of my laugh, he leapt in the air with all four feet off the ground, and I flew up with my four limbs above the saddle. I managed to stay on and one-rein stop. It was terrifying, but I changed my perspective that the best way to deal with it is to go with the flow. Uno wasn't being mean-spirited in the moment, and neither should I.
I still struggle when Uno wants to go forward, thinking he'll run off with me. I'm trying to find the balance between accepting where he's at with his progress and asking for a little more, the difference, for example, between just getting the trot and getting him to work at the trot. And, I need guidance on knowing when to end the lesson and not push the issue.
So, I'm not saying that I've figured out the answers to my challenges, but hopefully I embrace the idea that “Rome wasn't built in a day,” and neither are OTTBs. That's why Ashley won't just give me the blueprints but instead empowers me to go through the struggles, with her playing the role as trainer, foreperson, therapist, and inspiration, to create my own journey, wherever it may lead.
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